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:: "fuzzy romance and brutal terror" : apparently, I can get behind that ::
25th-Sep-2008 11:32 am
Moonlight Beth OMG!!!
So this morning, Boyfriend and I were loading up the defective TV stand into my car so that we can return it after work tonight. And I had noticed earlier that there was a dark SUV that had crawled down the street, stopped in the street, and then parked in front of the rental duplex next door. (One tends to be sensitive to these sorts of things when, for the first 19 months one lives in one's house, the rental duplex next door is occupied by drug dealers.) Then a sedan parks further down the street and a guy who looks like Samuel L. Jackson without hair gets out and eyes us as he walks towards us. (Boyfriend, later: "I was kind of nervous because I had a vibe like he was going to pull a gun on us.") Since we're staring at each other, I do the polite thing and say, "Hi", and he just nods silently back and walks past us to join up with the people who've gotten out of the SUV.

On the back of his dark blue jacket are the words: "US MARSHAL".

That's right.  The feds were surrounding the rental duplex next door to me. (Boyfriend, later: "That's when I realized why I had a gun-pulling vibe from him - he was likely sizing us up in case we were the people he was looking for, and he needed to pull a gun on us.")

I have no idea what's going on. Boyfriend texted me as I was on my way to work to tell me that they are looking for someone - I'm not sure if he eavesdropped, or just went outside and asked them (that's the sort of thing he'd do, whereas my instinct is to not make any form of eye contact with the people who are probably authorized by the Department of Homeland Security to shoot me if they don't like the color of my shirt).   I'm not sure exactly which crimes the US marshals investigate - and I'm not sure I want to know.  Then again, maybe you guys can help me figure it out!

What could the feds possibly be arresting Forsquilis' neighbors for?

They're running a meth lab in the basement.
One of the tenants is a devout Muslim - maybe he's a jihadist who sends his cab-driving tip money to Osama Bin Laden!
They're the masterminds who figured out Sarah Palin's sooper sekrit Yahoo email password and hacked it.
WTF? You know damn well her password was '123456'. Or, possibly, 'PASSWORD'.
They're illegal immigrants who worked at that kosher meat plant in Iowa, and the authorities have tracked them up here.
They're running a back-alley pill mill, helping local senior citizens get sinful prescription drugs from Canada.
Sarah Palin heard that one of them was a witch, and she's having them neutralized before they cast an evil spell on her.
Is this poll just an excuse to bash Sarah Palin? It's not her fault that her daughter got knocked up by a dumbass inbred redneck like the ones you were forced to grow up with.
Quit being so dramatic. I'm sure it's something simple, like, they're harboring a cousin who's wanted for murder in Texas, or something.
I like cake!
25th-Sep-2008 04:54 pm (UTC)
As I actually did just eat a piece of delicious cake, CAKE IT IS.

But US MARSHALS, OMG exciting!! Is it sad that I'm excited by law enforcement?
25th-Sep-2008 05:03 pm (UTC)
Mmmmm. Cake.

It actually was exciting just for a moment. Then I got worried that maybe there was indeed some kind of drug nastiness going on, and I'd come home to find that everything within a 200-foot radius of the place was off-limits till they decontaminate it, or something. (My brother lives in the country, and last year the cops busted a meth lab in the next house down the road, so he got to watch that process up close.) Then I remembered that they were just wearing street clothes under their jackets, so I got very curious and interested again.

Clearly, I need to get a real life.
25th-Sep-2008 04:59 pm (UTC)
That is both the craziest and most interesting story. Actual US Marshals making a bust...and sizing you and your boyfriend up just in case :-)

I hate Sarah Palin and hate that because I'm a woman I'm supposed to automatically root for her even if I fundamentally disagree with her. For that reason I think that Sarah Palin thinks your neighbours are witches.
25th-Sep-2008 05:11 pm (UTC)
Argh. Don't even get me started on the blatant pandering to women that the Republicans have engaged in. I can't believe that they misread Hillary Clinton's success so badly that they think the Hillary supporters will automatically switch to supporting an idiotic superstitious pettily-vengeful redneck. Whatever else one might say about Hillary, one can't deny that she is highly intelligent. I don't think anyone will ever accuse Palin of that.

I'm totally curious about the marshals and can't help speculating (I think this is the first time I've ever seen any in real life, and they're right freaking next door). The Somali family is quiet and friendly - I can't imagine what they might have done other than filing immigration paperwork incorrectly. There are new tenants on the other side who have only been there a few weeks, but they're quiet and stay indoors and I haven't met them. Maybe it's fanfic come to life and it's Sylar holding Mohinder and Molly prisoner, and Agent Hanson has tracked them down! Yeah, I definitely need to get a life.
25th-Sep-2008 06:02 pm (UTC)
But are we really that surprised that the Republicans misread Clinton's success the way they have? The Daily Show did a really good job of calling them out on their bullshit during the Republican convention. When it comes to intelligence Palin is at opposite end of the spectrum.

Yes, yes it's fanfic come to life. Sylar's next door and he's got Mohinder and Molly hostage and he's pretending it's only about messing them about but really part of him just wants Mohinder to admit how he feels. And just when it looks like Mohinder's walls were about to come crumbling down Agent Hanson finds them and Sylar is pissed.

It's always the quiet ones you have to be on the lookout for.
25th-Sep-2008 05:30 pm (UTC)
US Marshals specifically work on fugitive cases, and guarding prisoners in court and in transit. So, if US Marshals were there, likely the drug dealers are people with outstanding warrants or convictions, and they were primarily there to bust fugitives, not bust drugs. Otherwise it would be the DEA, or the FBI (maybe) if it crossed state lines. Or, it would be non-federal, and would just be a local police agency.
25th-Sep-2008 05:37 pm (UTC)
I didn't want to let myself get sucked into researching it, because that's the sort of thing that could easily lead me on a two-hour trip through connecting websites and Google searches as I see more and more things that make me curious. My first serious thought had been, that place has had 3 management companies in 4 years as well as a lot of tenant turnover; maybe the new manager or new tenants went through junk that's been sitting in the basement and found something left behind by the drug dealers that they reported. But then I'd thought, no, that would bring in local agencies and/or the DEA, not US marshals.

It's just weird to get that "they always seemed like nice people" feeling. You know, in a "Ted Bundy's neighbors all thought he seemed like a nice guy, too" way.
25th-Sep-2008 05:42 pm (UTC)
Haha. Every time I talk about law enforcement, I research it some more. I have an entire bookshelf full of law enforcement and espionage books. Little obsessed? Maybe.

But yeah, if you had marshals in there, you most likely had fugitives. Either I'm-hiding-my-cousin-because-she-accidentally-killed-this-nasty-dude fugitives or I'm-sure-as-HELL-not-gonna-go-down-on-drug-charges fugitives or what-have-you.

Kind of awesome, though. Marshals are seriously badass.
25th-Sep-2008 05:45 pm (UTC)
Marshals are seriously badass.

Oh, man. Thank you for that icon because I just now realized...the marshal was COMPLETELY giving me a Robert Hawkins vibe. As my boyfriend pretty much put it, the marshal made him uncomfortable in a "this man is obviously someone I don't want to mess with, please don't let him mess with me" way. And my boyfriend practices multiple martial arts, so giving him that vibe takes a seriously high badass quotient.
26th-Sep-2008 02:11 am (UTC)
I have an entire bookshelf full of law enforcement and espionage books.

Oh, okay, 'cause I was wondering how you knew that. ^_^

"No, officer, I never really paid much attention to those posters in the post office--I always thought she was just a nice person who wrote fanfic."
26th-Sep-2008 04:29 am (UTC)
When I see those pictures, I take them down - totally unflattering to my figure. I love my law enforcement books and tv shows :P Eventually, I figured I should actually know what the hell they're talking about, instead of just picking it up as I went along.
26th-Sep-2008 02:16 am (UTC)
Am I some kind of freak for not liking cake? Pie, totally. Brownies, yeah. Cheesecake is good, but it's not really cake.

Cake is just a big fat MEH of a dessert.
26th-Sep-2008 04:30 am (UTC)
It depends on the cake. A good cake is moist and dense, with an icing that isn't that sweet. I'd far rather have the "pumpkin bars" that they make at my local coffee shop. The "bar" part is more like a cake, and the pumpkin pie spices they put in it aren't too heavy. And it's got a cream cheese icing. One day last fall, one of the people ahead of me bought an entire pan to FedEx to a friend in NYC, because she couldn't find anything as tasty.

Of course, there's no way to get the recipe out of them...
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